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Things a Man Should Know About Drinking

There is no such thing as a chocolate martini.

There is no shame in club soda and cranberry juice.

There is a reason for the scarcity of piano bars.

Visiting the pub will be cheaper in the long run if you tip the bartender regularly and more generously than is necessary.

Never order a frozen drink in a place that serves pickled eggs.

Actually, never order a frozen drink.

It's also not a bad idea to eschew the pickled pigs' feet, although their presence is fairly strong evidence that you've accidentally stumbled upon a real tavern.

For the sake of the children, leave the pistol at home.

Champagne is a place. Bordeaux is a place. Champale is not a place.

Grappa is to lighter fluid as ouzo is to lighter fluid.

Garnish matters.

Despite a high ratio of female clientele, an insouciant way with fried mozzarella, and their prevalence in resort towns, establishments where a waitress pours shots into your mouth from a bottle she holsters in a bandolier are fraught with peril.

When throwing a party, break the seals on all liquor bottles, lest guests should hesitate to open them and come to doubt your hospitality.

Better yet: Hire a bartender.

The perfect manhattan: two parts bourbon, one part sweet vermouth, bitters, and a splash of cherry juice. Over rocks or not.

At the holiday office party, consume one drink less than your boss.

Adopt a new favorite cocktail on a seasonal basis.

That sangria means "bloodletting" is more a cautionary note than a simple fact.

Dry martinis, being nothing but gin, aren't all they're cracked up to be.

If you still want a martini, know that you cannot actually bruise gin, so go ahead and shake.

On the other hand, shaking introduces air bubbles that make the martini look cloudy for a time, so stir, already, if you're so particular.

Drinks that give you bad breath: beer, anything sweet, anything with milk.

Drinks that give you good breath: gin and tonic, gimlet, vodka and cranberry, anything with citrus.

Instead of ordering that shot of After Shock to cap off the evening, one could just walk calmly into the street, lie down, and wait.

Alternatively, you could pinch the bouncer's ass.

Every man should know how to make at least one drink from a foreign country, preferably one taught to him by a local female with whom he has had a complicated, unresolved, and quite possibly dangerous alliance.

The perfect negroni: four parts gin, one part sweet vermouth, and one part Campari shaken with ice and strained. Orange peel.

Citrus cocktails benefit greatly from rubbing lemon peel around the rim of the glass.

Jack Daniel's. Rocks.

Fresh orange juice. Fresh lemon juice. Fresh lime juice.

The perfect margarita: one part fresh lime juice, one part Cointreau, and one and a half parts tequila over ice.

On those chrome, hourglass-shaped bar measuring cups, the big side is the jigger. The little side is the pony. Never use the pony.

If you must: single-malt Scotch in a brandy snifter with a splash of water.

Avoid bars that use plastic cups, bars whose bathrooms consist solely of a trough-style urinal, bars with chicken wire protecting the band, bars where Patrick Swayze is the bouncer.

There is rarely any genuine need to shout "Skal!" "Na zdorovye!" "Slainte!" "Bottoms up!" or "Down the hatch!"

No one but the bouncer cares how tough you are, and he already knows you're not that tough.

A thought for the holidays: Gift wine should not be recognizable as having come from a grocery store.

Gift wine, being a gift, is not for tonight's party. Unless the host opens it.

Decent wine costs 15 dollars. Good wine costs 35 dollars. Nobody can tell the difference.

Never drink in a place that calls itself an eatery.

The cosmopolitan is over.

Rye isn't as popular as it used to be.

The perfect highball: one part rye to three parts ginger ale over Ice.

There is no upside to karaoke.

There is an ever-so-slight upside to a wet-T-Shirt contest, as long as you're not in it.

It is not necessary to request premium liquor for a mixed drink in which you cannot taste it, such as a gimlet or sour.

On the other hand, ascertain exactly how nonpremium the "well" liquor is before you opt against the good stuff.

Sitting at the bar works only for two people. Three or more requires a table.

Always check your fly before leaving the john.

If you were sitting in the john, make sure your wallet did not fall onto the floor.

Try to take care of the sitting thing at home.

Never utter the words I and love and you if you've had more than three drinks.

If you're a lightweight, make that one drink.

The perfect Shirley Temple: ginger ale over ice to fill a wineglass, splash grenadine, orange slice, lemon twist, cherry.

If a bartender makes you flail your arms or beg for service, well, obviously, leave.

Don't call the bartender Barkeep, Chief, Buddy, or Ace, unless his actual name, in fact, is Barkeep, Chief, Buddy, or Ace.

Even if you have ascertained your bartender's name, behaving overly familiar with him will be seen as a pathetic gambit for free drinks or, worse, proof that you have nobody to go to for affection other than a random service-industry professional who does not, in fact, know you and just wants your money.

Once you've fallen off a stool, there is little you can say to the bartender that will change his mind about asking you to leave.

Don't eat the worm.

If you don't smoke and you're in a bar, don't complain about other people who happen to be smoking, because, virtuous friend, you are in a bar.

Instead of trying to remember whether it's "beer before liquor" or the other way around, just be an adult and stick to one or the other.

Acceptable drinks for men: beer, wine, whiskey, cocktails that are neither sweet nor made with dairy or fruit other than lime or lemon or orange.

Acceptable drinks for women: whatever they want, except a certain few.

A certain few: the grasshopper, the Long Island iced tea, the pink lady, and any variety of spritzer.

Also unacceptable: drinks whose names mimic critical medical conditions or copulative acts and their secretions.

And while we're on the subject, drinks that are named after supposedly cute body parts, like navels, which are actually disgusting repositories for sebaceous grime: No.

All of that said, never question a woman's drink choice.

If you're the first in the group to arrive and you start a tab on your card, you deserve exactly what's coming to you.

Campari shaken with ice and strained into a martini glass.

Unless you are lounging on the Promenade Deck, do not drink from a fruit.

The perfect martini: There is no such thing as the perfect martini. Make it the way it tastes best to you.

Provided that you remember that there is no such thing as a chocolate martini.


The Life Handbook

Drink plenty of water.
Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar..
Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
Make time to practice meditation, yoga, and prayer.
Play more games.
Read more books than you did last year.
Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
Sleep for 7 hours.
Take a 10-30 minutes walk every day. And while you walk, smile.

Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
Don't over do. Keep your limits.
Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.
Dream more while you are awake.
Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin
 your present happiness.
Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.
No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you20learn will last a lifetime.
Smile and laugh more.
You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Call your family often.
Each day give something good to others.
Forgive everyone for everything.
Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
Try to make at least three people smile each day.
What other people think of you is none of your business.
Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

Do the right thing!
Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
GOD heals everything.
However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
No matter how you feel, get up, dress up an d show up.
The best is yet to come.
When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it.
Your Inner most is always happy. So, be happy.


''Life's tough.....it's even tougher if you're stupid.''    ~ John Wayne

"The reason I love my dog so much is because when I come home, he's the only one in the world who treats me like I'm The Beatles." - Bill Maher

"An appeal to arms and the God of hosts is all that is left us. But we shall not fight our battle alone. There is a just God that presides over the destinies of nations. The battle sir, is not  to the strong alone. Is life so dear or peace so sweet as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it almighty God. I know not what course others may take, but as for me, give me liberty, or give me death."    -Patrick Henry

“Live each season as it passes. Breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit, and resign yourself to the influences of each.” -- Henry David Thoreau

"Always demanding the best of oneself, living with honor, devoting one's talents and gifts to the benefits of others—these are the measures of success that endure when material things have passed away."   —Henry Ford

"Iron rusts from disuse, stagnant water loses its purity, and in cold weather becomes frozen, even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind." - Leonardo Da Vinci

"Know the true value of time; snatch, seize, and enjoy every moment of it. No idleness, no laziness, no procrastination: never put off till tomorrow what you can do today."            - Lord Chesterfield

"If you believe in what you are doing, then let nothing hold you up in your work. Much of the best work of the world has been done against seeming impossibilities. The thing is to get the work done." - Dale Carnegie

"You hit home runs not by chance but by preparation."— Roger Maris

"Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance."    — Dave Barry

"Do what you can, with what you have, where you are."    - Theodore Roosevelt

“Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it”- William Arthur Ward

“As long as you keep a person down, some part of you has to be down there to hold him down. So it means you cannot soar as you might otherwise do” - Marion Anderson

“If you find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn’t lead anywhere.” - Jean Jacques Rousseau

“A peacock that rests on his feathers is just another turkey” - Dolly Parton

 “Friendship is the only cement that will ever hold the world together” - Woodrow Wilson

 “It is an illusion to think that more comfort means more happiness. Happiness comes of the capacity to feel deeply, to enjoy simply, to think freely, and to be needed. - Storm Jameson

“A difficult time can be more readily endured if we retain the conviction that our existence holds a purpose: a cause to pursue, a person to love, a goal to achieve.”  -  John Maxwell

 “To dream anything that you want to dream, that is the beauty of the human mind. To do anything you want to do, that is the strength of the human will. To trust yourself to test your limit, that is the courage to succeed.” - Bernard Edmonds

"Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?"    — Frank Scully

"There are no dead ends. There is always a way out. What you learn in one failure, you utilize in your next success. —Henry Ford

"Do things for others and you'll find your self-consciousness evaporating like morning dew on a Missouri cornfield in July."    — Dale Carnegie

Apparently a teacher has been arrested in the UK in possession of compasses, protractor, and straight edge. It is claimed he is a member of the Al Gebra movement bearing weapons of math instruction.


Who needs the Dali Lama?..........

Philosophy for Life According to Yog Manog


Open your mind - Clear your head. Think outside the box. Expect the unexpected.

Remove the obstacles which prevent you from seeing clearly with your mind’s eye.


Open Your Heart- Get rid of your ego. Get rid of your pride. Get rid of your hatred.

Open Your Heart-- Allow yourself to see each subtle miracle presented to us every day.

Open Your Heart- Allow yourself to Love and practice compassion.

Strive EVERYDAY to be Honest, Humble, Truthful and Forthright.

Remember the most important legacy a man can pass to his son is his honest name.


Shed all your preconceived notions, assumptions, bias, and prejudice.

Let GO and let GOD.


Most of all, be Strong, the negative powers of the force are all around us, always tempting us.

Open Your Eyes - see how strong you must be against it.



Life is a journey, if you are lucky you will learn profound things along the way;

use them to constantly better yourself.



Free yourself and by that become a conduit for the awesome power of GOD.

OPEN yourself and allow HIS love to flow through you.


C Perhaps you might just find that one J thing that brings true inner peace. B